Welcome to The Wordz Blog Relaunch with me, the one and only LaShanna R. Tripp!
In 2019, my brother-from-another and true-to-life business partner, James Jordan of Grace Jordan Studios, developed a blog area on the website he designed for me, and I stared at it.
No, seriously. I did.
If you scroll down to read the content, it was cool, but the posting was inconsistent. There was an article here and a thought there. It was truly random.
Fast-forward to 2021, past the epic year of 2020 (we all know what global impact occurred that year), and I had manifested an online publishing gig that I was really excited about but seemed to struggle with putting my heart into.
Changing My Mindset
In April 2021, a friend of mine invited me to a Bob Proctor live training, and it has been a ride ever since.
This led to my being connected with an incredible wealth mindset group led by a young, black brother with the wisdom of the elders, Mr. Darrin Gibson. He reiterated a phrase during our frequent master classes that pinched me in my ass:
“How you do anything is how you do everything.”
What the hell did I manifest?
I had taught theatre since 2008 until God led me to a full-time opportunity to teach it in public education in 2011. I was continuously told, “Oh this is great for you! You get to teach what you love!”
Eight years later, I resigned before I neared a nervous breakdown. There was rarely a chance to teach anything between learning how to teach high school students basic etiquette and conflict resolution skills before I could even get to the content.
With very limited parental support and scarce student focus, I was attempting to craft a sustainable theatre program while the students it needed were dealing with issues I just couldn’t compete with.
Then, a slow realization hit me.
I was on a hamster wheel trying to senselessly please everybody.
I was a constant people-pleaser who wanted everyone to like me. My family, my students, their parents, my colleagues, and the clerk at Walmart. EVERYONE.
Of course, this goes back to childhood when I never wanted to get in trouble with my mom, and always wanted to be a good child. So I would help wherever I could, and try to be perfect.
The problem is, there is no such thing. Well, unless you’ve met my mini-me humans, Miracle, Connie III, and Ajah. They’re amazing. Not perfect, but definitely amazing!
The journey I’ve encountered following the departure from a job that seemed to suck the life out of me despite it being in a field I was passionate about has been mind-blowing. You begin to learn more about yourself when you strip away everyone and everything that’s pulling at you.
You don’t owe anything to anyone except God and yourself.
The Struggle to Finish
A stream of failures since college graduation in 1996 seemed to stall me at every turn.
- I hadn’t landed an internship in entertainment.
- I was turned down to write on several shows I really wanted to write for (Touched by An Angel and Living Single were going off the air).
- Despite an amazingly creative application package for a writing internship with Southern Living, I was a year too old for the program and was denied employment.
- I always seemed to be too old to compete on American Idol, up until they finally opened it up to all ages, and by then, the show had lost its appeal to me.
- My song, “Just Believe,” didn’t win the American Idol Songwriting competition (notice that competition lasted just one year. I think it was because they ignored my amazing anthem, which was produced by one of today’s hottest producers from Birmingham, B-Phlat. I digress.)
- My family and I lost everything during the 2010 recession, from our house, cars, jobs and “friends.”
- I am still, to this very day, after 20 years of failing at every audition, clinging to hopes of portraying Rafiki in Broadway’s The Lion King. This shouldn’t be on one’s Bucket List, but it is. I can do that.
These are only half of the failures.
My book, Letter to My Daughter, which God told me to write over 10 years ago, is on my list of successes because it is a series, with one part completed and edited, awaiting publishing. We will start the other two parts soon enough because it is time.
Facing the Truth
Now, after making exponential investments, running with some great teams, and working hard to make a big difference in my family’s life by achieving massive goals, I have had to step back due to huge financial losses. However, everyone on the team is winning big.
One can only wonder what did I do to really screw that up?
Why did it seem that I failed at everything targeting wealth-building and getting my kids into a home of their own?
The truth? It was proper planning and consistency.
Then, another mentor of mine, Desi Lipova, said “You need to show up for yourself daily. Consistency compounds.”
I did as she directed and put a sign on my office wall. I looked at it, and looked at it, and realized I was not being consistent in some of my daily activities. Darrin suggested just focusing on two habits at a time and mastering them. Then, once I mastered them, to move on to the next two.
I learned that consistency meant more than just beating the path daily to build your success. Showing up for yourself daily is:
- putting away distractions that keep you from progressing,
- carving time out to spend with yourself to decompress, and
- loving yourself enough to start again, even in the face of yet more failures.
Having failed at a number of things, I should know!
Okay, so I really shouldn’t be happy about this, but accepting the hilarity of it all is actually quite cathartic! I mean, once you’ve hit rock bottom there’s nowhere else to go but UP!
So, what have you failed at lately that has led to an epiphany like this all has for me? I’d love to hear it!
Just remember, if you’re perfect at everything, you’re not perfect at just being yourself.
Getting Real with Yourself
Darrin’s phrase still rings loudly in my ears: how you do anything is how you do everything.
I had to sit down and assess WHY. I knew I wanted more for my kids, but what was really going on? What kept me from actually making progress in the areas I wanted to achieve in?
Since I could remember, all I ever wanted to do was write, travel, make greeting cards, act and sing. THAT WAS IT. So simple, right?
When my parents cautioned me not to move back to California because they wouldn’t be able to get to me should something happen, I allowed their fear to hinder me. Despite having an agent and a job lined up, I backed out in fear.
BECAUSE OF FEAR.
Another phrase I initially first heard from a mentor in 2019 proved to be quite relevant to wealth builders I began to meet around the world:
“If you buy someone’s opinion, you have to buy their lifestyle.”
I clearly had to stop listening to the wrong people, even family, as much as I loved them. And a lot of this had been poured into my subconscious mind since I was a child.
And none of my immediate family members had built enough sustainable wealth to completely leave their jobs and build a career they really enjoyed, and pass down that inheritance to their families. Sure, they had homes, cars, maybe two or three streams of income, and could plan trips here or there. But they all had jobs.
Trading time for money does not equal financial freedom.
After nearing nervous breakdowns, working 12-hour days without the ability to travel (after 14 years of marriage, we have yet to enjoy a honeymoon), and still not doing creative work I was passionate about, I knew I had to do something different.
I recalled quickly how I was always aiming to be the perfect kid, the perfect teacher, the perfect business partner, the perfect wife, the perfect sister, the perfect friend, and the perfect mom.
I realized how this was coming across to my kids just the other day when I didn’t get 8-year-old Ajah’s sunny-side-up eggs cooked without them sticking to the pan.
“Mom, they don’t have to be perfect,” she said happily, as she ate them ravenously. “They’re still really good.”
Despite Ajah trying to talk me off the ledge of personal damnification, I suddenly stopped to overhear myself making excuses for not achieving egg perfection:
“The pan was too high. I didn’t have enough oil in the pan.” Rawr, rawr, rawr!
I was doing it to myself. Again.
As I near 48, I look back over my life to realize that I have cut off my feet just to be liked by everyone in my circle. And it caused me to be stripped of everything familiar, to lose the friends I was trying not to lose, and to squander my valuable time.
The family and friends I have aimed for years to please were living their lives as they pleased while I was immobilized in fear and the insanity of being a people-pleaser!
Just Keep Going
After everything has crumbled, and I have endured the stares and overcome the shoulda-woulda-coulda, others have silently bowed out of my life while God, my immediate family, my writing, and creativity are what I have to turn to. All I can do is keep going.
Not clamoring to finish.
Not killing myself to be number one.
Not dying from the depressive state due to all of the rejection hitting me from what seems to be every side.
But just continuing to keep moving. Enjoying the journey to find and increase what my dear friend, Donise Boyd says is “God’s field of favor,” just for me.
I am so happy and grateful for my brother James. He is an amazing business partner with incredible foresight in technology.
This blog, this website. wouldn’t exist without his phenomenal skills, belief in me, and his amazing wife’s support of both of our crazy dreams and intense conversations over these decades.
The relaunch of The Wordz Blog must cover everything I love. I couldn’t narrow it to one niche, so I decided it will be a focused, daily blog.
Why? To challenge myself to be consistent and write daily.
It has to be something I love and enjoy! This blog will bring some of everything to your palate every day of the week and will include poetry, acting, spoken word, and music performances.
Here’s a new outline for The Wordz Blog:
- Monday’s Miraculous Moments – highlighting positive news and announcements in the community
- Tuesday’s Technology Tips – sharing new tech haps, news, and gadgets
- Wednesday’s Wordz & Romanze Series – original fairy tales & fictional romance stories
- Thursday Theatrics – opening shows, play reviews, and performance videos
- Friday’s Food Infatuations – just a few thoughts on eating, good eating, and overeating
- Saturday’s Simmering Situations – updates on the best weekend events
- Sunday’s Soothing Insights – sharing inspirational and positive insights
This blog was very exciting to plan!
Hopefully, my excitement reaches and inspires those who need it, and sparks something creative in your own soul as well. Enjoy!